Today's 'chaos'

Today, I went to school for self-revision as per scheduled in my schedule. On my way to school, I heard that someone said in a very surprised tone that Rachel said that she will not go to school. Which Rachel, I do not recognize in face but I know that it's the Rachel who tried very hard to stick to (erm, there are many Sams rite...?) a Sam, and after knowing how attached, she tried all means to bring me down (that sounded similar again...but I know that she started it before probably in 2010, if I didn't get it wrongly and if ppl who were close to him were accurate from their observations and were truthful in that conversation that I hear behind my back, he did thought that what happened to me--the events--happened to her). She did stayed in the unit, above my unit, for a short time, and that's when I heard her talking to the tenants who lent her a room to stay. And it was around the same time that the one who got friends to sign in to her fb account and post comments, which was actually faking comments and opinions on her status.

My apologies if I sounded like letting out all information out but the things that she does is really way out of line. I heard that Sam was asked (not sure if it's more like got kicked out or just asked) to go out of the door today. If she really liked him, this is not the way. Deceiving. Using deception to turn everyone to her side. And the thing is it seemed as though it is the norm in a certain 'group'. And it's selfish obsession. And it just so happens that she has the same name that one of my best friend, and two acquaintance have. That Rachel that I mentioned in my private blog, I was referring to the Rachel whom I know, have talked to back in my high school days. And the Rachel whom if I did mention during SHAREZ outings was referring to my best friend.

What I wrote in my private blog were true to the core. My actual thoughts at that time, my experiences, my hardships. I did not write it for the sake of gaining attention. For goodness's sake, I knew how the world operates at a very young age, furthermore being at the receiving end. It already caused me PTSD. It took me a lot of courage and effort to get out of it, and some effects/phobia, still stayed with me till now. I would have ran away from those kind of attention. Those freaking attention. That was why I was so reluctant to type some of the BlogSpot posts, especially some of those in 2010, 2011. But simply because of what I had gone through, I seriously could not sit back and watch it from unfolding and seeing the world spiral down until there's no use for solutions anymore.

K. Back to that. I was very sure of my guess that Rachel said that because she heard frm someone or others that I withdraw from the school's fellowship because I couldn't stay back for long. And I actually did posted "Ephesians 6: Honour your parents and the sword of the Sprit" on my fb status after that stressful--in a sense(it created a strain)--fb message. However, I did said that I am a bit unpredictable in one of my BlogSpot post. It's exam stress. I need to practice and be sure of myself before the exam dates close in, and totally freaking out. If she had read every posts, she would have known better to not declare what I will be or what I will not be doing or wearing etc. Diligence. And even if she is diligent, the Lord knows what He allows to happen, and when to intervene.

And seriously, it shows something about that person who believe what she said, and showed him the door. And those who spread those malicious rumours. And please, he had gone through enough. It's politics game, a game of fame and those kinds of icky, yakky things. And it seemed as though he's not quite apt in reading other's intentions behind their actions. Thank god  for God. I only knew of it today that he was the one who swap my id with his (name) to protect me. Seriously. I knew that ppl were mistaking me for him. But I didn't know it was him. Much more his intentions. Though I could have guess his intentions if I knew it was him.